Friday, 27 March 2015

Warhammer Campaign: Empire against Bretonnia

Abelard von Gesegnet shook his head. What in the name of Ulric was that drumming noise? He closed his eyes again, but the noise persisted. Now there was some sort of shouting going on. Could a man never get a moment's peace?
With a splintering sound the door to Abelard's chamber burst from it's hinges. Von Gesegnet leaped from his bed and seized a half-full chamber pot to hurl at the invaders.
"Sire" his secretary said, wiping the contents of the chamber pot from his ornate headwear "you appear to have overslept. The enemy has been sighted and the rest of the army has marched. Your knights are waiting in the courtyard"
"Bring me my armour" roared the half-naked General "Oh, and someone put some clothes on those halflings"

Flushed with success after last weeks triumphant drubbing* of the High Elves I ventured forth to Der Norden Notts Spielsaal in high spirits. The forces of Abelard von Gesegnet were once more ready to face down the Bretonnian strumpet and her foolish followers.
This time we were to play the Meeting Engagement scenario.The fickle Terrain Gods granted us nine pieces of terrain, including an interesting water feature in the right hand corner. The fickle Turning-up-on-Time Gods then decreed that about half my army would be late arriving at the battlefield. Fortunately the fickle Stealing-the-First-Turn Gods were on my side, so I got to go first.

 The Wissenland Whitespears (and friends)

 Pass me the pie plate template

 Where are they...

...just in time!
The pistoliers, mindful of previous encounters, sneaked behind a building, before whizzing out to march block the knights and pepper them with shot. Ineffectually.
The Bright Wizard summoned up a mighty Fireball, which gave him a huge headache and cost him a wound. The target unit of knights predictably passed all their saves.
The mortar landed on the Bretonnian archers, killing many, but they must be getting used to it by now and passed their break test with ease.

The last of Stephen's knights arrived, including a chap with a flamethrower attachment on his lance who duly roasted the pistoliers and saw them flee the board. Still not quite got the hang of this fast cavalry lark.
The peasant bowmen scurried to seek shelter in the nearby tower.The sorceress tried to get some Dwellers up from the deep, but they stayed down below where they belong.

 "You just press zis leetle button and WHOOOSH!"

 Skewer them!

My knights could just about see the Pegasi winging toward them and so charged home. Nothing else much moved.
Once more the Bright Wizard launched flaming death at his foes. But the flames hit a mirror and the wizard dropped dead. Bugger.
The cannon killed a knight or two.
Abelard and his men laid about the winged horses to pleasing effect and the Bretonnian nobles turned tail and were cut down. The general and his men cantered through the woods with no ill effects.

 If we run away then....oh, bugger

Failing to flee leads to fallen comrades
The Bretonian general launched his unit at the Kislevites. Who forgot to run away and were wiped out where they stood. The Trebuchets were proving to be pleasingly ineffective for a change, and the treacherous Dwarf allies and the peasant bowmen found it difficult to hurt the inner circle knights.

The Empire knights reformed to face the Dwarfs whilst the rest of the army took aim at the Bretonnian general and his men. Many of whom fell off their horses.

 Splish, splash, eugh!

 Bang, flash,splash,trample!

Attempting to charge home the Bretonnian standard bearer realised he'd forgotten his spurs and instead paddled into the water. The general however thundered home into a hail of lead and slightly toxic water and only he and the standard bearer made it into the handgunners. Whom they promptly chopped to bits. The Dwarfs and peasants continued to watch their missiles bounce off the Empire knights.

Abelard ordered the charge and his men cantered through the trees unharmed and crashed into the Dwarfs, wiping them all out. Which is coincidentally what the his Bretonnian counterpart was  doing to the cannon - as a result of which the mortar crew fled.

Come on, then, lets 'ave it!
The Bretonnian flag man threw the reverse switch on his unit and they backed out of the water, leaving one comrade putrefying in the eddies.
The sorceress finally got through to the Dwellers below, who dragged Abelard and most of his men beneath the ground. Those who survived were disappointed by the sudden arrival of most of a house on their heads from the nearby trebuchet.

And with that the battle drew to a close.

Good fun, but a bit of a walk over for the Bretonnians. I think my army may need a rethink.
  • The spearmen unit is too big and hard, so never gets into fights, just gets avoided and becomes the target of shooting and magic.
  • The knights unit is good, but big for this size of game, and my General isn't quite enough of a killing machine.
  • I can't use light cavalry
  • My wizard is a self-immolating liability.
So I'm considering breaking my self-imposed "Don't change the army list" rule. I may reduce the size of the spearmen, experiment with the general's kit, try and get another fighty foot unit. Oh and get a different wizard altogether.

*flukey win


  1. I always look forward to your self-deprecating and humorous battle reports!

  2. A good batrep and only slightly different from Steveo's :-) I like the scenario but have never been very lucky with it. Maybe it's an Empire thing.

  3. Thanks chaps.
    I always struggle with this scenario for some reason. the temptation of setting up too close just because you can is usually overwhelming.

  4. Great report, good luck with the light cavalry, depending on which rules you are using they have become less effective than they were. My pistoliers tend to play as outriders who pack more of a punch.